[ Which her father has in spades. Baela doesn't wish to think more about it.
She gestures with her hands, fingers spread like she's holding something that's invisible. ]
Jace has this quiet confidence… [ Speaking of, Baela begins to lose her confidence as he remembers who she's speaking to. But she trucks on - ] He's hardly an ass. That's what I like about him.
[Be grateful she did not keep talking about how she likes them a little mean, that would have been a much more scarring path to wander down.]
You are wiser about this than I was at your age, then. Or then I am now, even. I think we must give Laenor most of the credit for that, he was much more kind than he was an ass. Although he was also a horrible gossip.
[ What Baela knows of him, he had been kind and gentle and had a laugh akin to a dragon's roar. He had to be the calmer side to the coin; her mother was ferocious. ]
Oh, very frequently. It was one of our favorite pastimes, as a pair.
I suppose that isn't the most mature example. Perhaps I should have lied about this. [But she didn't, and clearly she doesn't regret being a questionable influence in this, because she's laughing a little.]
[ The quickness in which she dismisses such an expectation—perhaps Baela should be aghast by her openness. But has she ever needed to overly watch herself with Rhaenyra? ]
All that matters is that you had fun. And you did, didn't you? [ She doesn't stop smiling. ] Were you ever caught? I always thought my uncle was loud. I remember he had a loud laugh.
[It's a very pleasant bout of nostalgia, she gets lost in for a moment.]
We were certainly overheard a few times, by the people we may have been discussing. What caused more of a problem, though, was the fact that neither of us could ever manage to keep a straight face when we were caught. Eventually we learned to mostly keep our gossiping to our chambers. Unless we were drinking.
We were bad influences on each other, truly. But it was fun.
[ Sometimes Baela wishes she were older so she could have such memories to tide her over when she feels like a stranded dragon on Driftmark. There are too many people she hardly recalls.
She smiles. ]
You must've really cared for him, even though you were clearly the corruptor.
[Please behold her best attempt at an expression of affront, while she can't stop smiling. Doubtless, it looks very silly.]
I was clearly the corruptor? I have no idea why you would reach that conclusion at all!
I did really care for him. Our marriage may not have made sense to most people, or been traditional in most ways, but there was still a great deal of love in it.
[ It's a joke, meant to somehow smoothen out the sharper parts of Rhaenyra's confession. Baela knows the stories, of course—so many doubted her love for her uncle. But how could they when Rhaenyra's face brightens when speaking of him? ]
Rhaenys always spoke about how kind and quiet he was. For him to be a gossip, you must've had a hand in that. [ She smiles. ] I wish I remembered him. He sounds like he would have been fun to talk to. He would've had many secrets to share about you.
Alright, alright, yes, plenty of that too. I am a very good bad influence.
[It does make her chuckle, as well as being true.]
She's right, he was those things as well. Especially with the children. Few men would have been so... engaged. And yes, he had plenty of stories where I seem absolutely ridiculous, and he would have very happily told you all of them. Probably more than once.
[ Even though that may not bring her as much comfort as she'd have liked, it gives her some. Rhaenyra carries some of Laena with her that Baela won't ever get her hands on. ]
I wonder if she'd have enjoyed your gossiping, too—or was my uncle the only unserious one?
I can see Rhaenys insist that she have an opinion on something. I like how encouraging she is. She always wants to hear what I have to say, even if I don't agree with her.
Was my father like that? He varied. When I was younger, he always wanted to hear my opinions, but... as I grew older, we talked less and less. ['As I grew older.' It's true enough to not feel guilty for giving that explanation instead of a more accurate one.]
As for having an opinion of his own on something and voicing it, that he largely tried to avoid.
[ It's contemplative. What Baela remembers is a degenerating dragon, but what everyone has said about Viserys… Wasn't he kind, and a figure of peace? Did that peace eat him up from the inside?
After a moment - ]
It's like they're afraid. Sometimes I think Father is afraid that I'll say something he hasn't thought of. Maybe Grandsire was the same. They want to appear like they know all, because they believe they should, but they forget that sometimes another has a different perspective. I don't believe there's anything wrong with that.
[ She preens and stops herself from asking Really?. Of course, she's correct! Baela can be correct sometimes! ]
Have you seen how Father smiles when you praise him for his planning? He likes taking care of you. I think it makes him feel good about himself. He'd never say it. He's an idiot.
[ She flushes. Her father is an idiot, but Baela has only ever confessed such a thing to Rhaena and Jace. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
A little. I always thought, well… You liked the confidence in someone. It never occurred to me that you'd like the fact that they were an ass.
[ Now, if Rhaenyra had said she liked him for his ass, Baela would finally have an excuse to seek therapy. ]
no subject
Oh, confidence is very attractive as well, you are correct about that.
no subject
She gestures with her hands, fingers spread like she's holding something that's invisible. ]
Jace has this quiet confidence… [ Speaking of, Baela begins to lose her confidence as he remembers who she's speaking to. But she trucks on - ] He's hardly an ass. That's what I like about him.
no subject
You are wiser about this than I was at your age, then. Or then I am now, even. I think we must give Laenor most of the credit for that, he was much more kind than he was an ass. Although he was also a horrible gossip.
no subject
Really?
[ What Baela knows of him, he had been kind and gentle and had a laugh akin to a dragon's roar. He had to be the calmer side to the coin; her mother was ferocious. ]
Did you gossip a lot with him?
no subject
I suppose that isn't the most mature example. Perhaps I should have lied about this. [But she didn't, and clearly she doesn't regret being a questionable influence in this, because she's laughing a little.]
no subject
[ The quickness in which she dismisses such an expectation—perhaps Baela should be aghast by her openness. But has she ever needed to overly watch herself with Rhaenyra? ]
All that matters is that you had fun. And you did, didn't you? [ She doesn't stop smiling. ] Were you ever caught? I always thought my uncle was loud. I remember he had a loud laugh.
no subject
[It's a very pleasant bout of nostalgia, she gets lost in for a moment.]
We were certainly overheard a few times, by the people we may have been discussing. What caused more of a problem, though, was the fact that neither of us could ever manage to keep a straight face when we were caught. Eventually we learned to mostly keep our gossiping to our chambers. Unless we were drinking.
We were bad influences on each other, truly. But it was fun.
no subject
She smiles. ]
You must've really cared for him, even though you were clearly the corruptor.
no subject
I was clearly the corruptor? I have no idea why you would reach that conclusion at all!
I did really care for him. Our marriage may not have made sense to most people, or been traditional in most ways, but there was still a great deal of love in it.
no subject
[ It's a joke, meant to somehow smoothen out the sharper parts of Rhaenyra's confession. Baela knows the stories, of course—so many doubted her love for her uncle. But how could they when Rhaenyra's face brightens when speaking of him? ]
Rhaenys always spoke about how kind and quiet he was. For him to be a gossip, you must've had a hand in that. [ She smiles. ] I wish I remembered him. He sounds like he would have been fun to talk to. He would've had many secrets to share about you.
no subject
[It does make her chuckle, as well as being true.]
She's right, he was those things as well. Especially with the children. Few men would have been so... engaged.
And yes, he had plenty of stories where I seem absolutely ridiculous, and he would have very happily told you all of them. Probably more than once.
no subject
[ Sounded. Baela's still not used to speaking about some of her family in the past tense.
She scratches her cheek and decides looking away from Rhaenyra isn't best. ]
Do you miss him?
[ A silly question to ask, but Baela feels it's better phrased as one than a statement. ]
no subject
[A touch of sadness enters the smile. If only Westeros had divorce, to go with their lavender marriages.]
I do, yes.
no subject
Does it help to talk about him?
no subject
It does. It has been a while since I got the chance to.
no subject
Baela fiddles with her fingers and stops herself. ]
Did you know my mother well?
book canon, I wish they'd stuck to you here
Not nearly as well as I should have, but some. If we had ever been in the same place for long, I think we would have been very close friends.
it's fine, we're going to in 890534 other threads!
I wonder if she'd have enjoyed your gossiping, too—or was my uncle the only unserious one?
you're right!
[This is a compliment, truly.
Granted it may not have ben a compliment if said by other people, but from Rhaenyra, it is high praise.]
no subject
I can see Rhaenys insist that she have an opinion on something. I like how encouraging she is. She always wants to hear what I have to say, even if I don't agree with her.
[ #1 Rhaenys fan. ]
Was your father like that?
no subject
Was my father like that? He varied. When I was younger, he always wanted to hear my opinions, but... as I grew older, we talked less and less. ['As I grew older.' It's true enough to not feel guilty for giving that explanation instead of a more accurate one.]
As for having an opinion of his own on something and voicing it, that he largely tried to avoid.
no subject
[ It's contemplative. What Baela remembers is a degenerating dragon, but what everyone has said about Viserys… Wasn't he kind, and a figure of peace? Did that peace eat him up from the inside?
After a moment - ]
It's like they're afraid. Sometimes I think Father is afraid that I'll say something he hasn't thought of. Maybe Grandsire was the same. They want to appear like they know all, because they believe they should, but they forget that sometimes another has a different perspective. I don't believe there's anything wrong with that.
no subject
Do you know, I think you may be exactly correct. I had never thought about it like that.
no subject
Have you seen how Father smiles when you praise him for his planning? He likes taking care of you. I think it makes him feel good about himself. He'd never say it. He's an idiot.
[ She flushes. Her father is an idiot, but Baela has only ever confessed such a thing to Rhaena and Jace. ]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)